The weather has been incredibly cold. It's really just the wind. The wind cuts through clothing just like you don't have anything on. We tried to go for a walk today, but it was just too cold.
A few days ago I woke up with a stiff neck. I've put myself on bed rest. This seems to happen to me every couple of years. I remember the very first time it happened was on the same day as 9-11. Anyway, it's getting better on the side that was hurting. Unfortunately, it's moving to the back of my neck. I messed up too because I got a bit frustrated yesterday. The house wasn't getting cleaned, dishes were piled up in the sink, everything just was annoying me. I got up, swept the floor, mopped, washed dishes, did laundry, emptied trash cans. On top of that, I sat at the computer for several hours trying to catch up on my medical studies. Now I'm paying for it. I just couldn't take the house looking the mess that it did and falling behind on my work. It's times like these when I wish I had a house keeper.
I pulled out my Chinese book today and started doing some review. I got to lesson 10 in about 2 hours. It's a 100 lesson study. I plan to finish it during the holiday. We'll see what happens. If I study it completely, then I'll have to get to lesson 50. Then go back to lesson 1 and translate lessons 1-50 into Chinese. Then continue studying until lesson 100. Then go back to lesson 50 and translate lessons 50-100 into Chinese. It's a challenging course. I think I can get it done though. It's all about time management.
Spending all this time studying at the computer makes me a very unhealthy girl. My mind is knowledgeable, but my body suffers from it. As I get older, my knees get stiff, my back and neck hurts and I get headaches. I've got to find a balance and integrate some regular exercise and outside activities into my schedule. I hate going out into the cold, but I may have to just to get some fresh air. We'll see what happens.
A few days ago I found a church website that caught my attention. The minister let's people email him with any question they like and he responds with a mostly biblical response. I've been enjoying reading the questions and answers. Some of the questions are quite ridiculous. Others I think are ridiculous, but turn out to be legitimate once you realize that the person's a new Christian, or a non-Christian. The website gets about 7000 hits. People from all walks of life send questions to the minister. Anyway, it's been really fun for me. I can get 10-20 mini-sermons in one day.
Colonel has started up with his studies again. To be honest, I'm glad that he's taking it more seriously this week. I hope that we both continue to be more serious about our studies. Sometimes when you're doing self-paced studies, it's easy to get distracted with life or with hobbies that you enjoy more than your studies.
We've managed to spend a bit more time with the kids. During the Christmas season we watched the great Christmas light fight. The kids enjoyed that. They don't really remember seeing Christmas lights in America.
We're coming up on the end of our fifth year in China. The school has already started asking us if we're going to stay. We just haven't decided. We're looking for other opportunities everywhere. I'm really interested in returning to the states, but not just for the sake of returning. There must be a purpose and a clear area where we can serve and use the skills that God has given us. Otherwise, we'd just be going back to be a burden on friends and family. No matter what happens we want to be in the best position possible to serve God.
All this week I've been running across one particular scripture as I study the Bible:
"For Christ sent me not to baptize, but to preach the gospel: not in wisdom of words, lest the cross of Christ should be made void. For the word of the cross is to them that perish foolishness; but unto us who are saved it is the power of God. "
"For seeing that in the wisdom of God the world through its wisdom knew not God, it was God's good pleasure through the foolishness of the preaching to save them that believe."
1 Corinthians 1: 17, 18, 21 (ASV)
Honestly, that whole chapter applies here. This is written by Paul, but it's what I've been struggling with. Ever since we came back to this city, I've been so focused on the fact that there's been no one coming to the Lord. The truth is that I'm just here to tell others about the Gospel. If people are moved by the Lord, that's between them and God. All I can do is tell them about it. I can't make anyone believe or really even persuade them. They've got to be moved by the Spirit, by the Bible, by Jesus' story. When I look at our journey in this city from this perspective, I realize that I've done everything that I set out to do here. For almost three years in this city, we've been doing nothing but spreading the word. Every member of my family has been involved in this activity. It's been our lives. It's been our purpose and our very painful passion. People have laughed at us. They've called us stupid. Said that we're fools for not believing in science. They've considered are beliefs a bunch of fairy tales. They've completely ignored us, talked about us, and been downright rude and dismissive.
Folks have separated us from them by considering the Bible a cultural thing: It's good for American culture, but not for their culture. I just can't explain the hurtful things people have said and done. Yet we've continued. Up to this point there's been no real resistance. We've seen the same people who ignore us come to us for advice, for help, and eventually for Bible study. We've lost some potential friends over our insistence on the scriptures. It's all in line with what Christ said would happen. We've just been short of persecution here. I'm happy that it hasn't come to that yet.
In the end, it's just about spreading the word. That is the exact same attitude that I had in Jingzhou. I didn't have such a heavy weight in Jingzhou as I've had here. Most of it was because of my perspective. I went into it with the realization that I couldn't make anyone become a Christian. I'm so happy to re-realize this. It does remove the weight of the world from my shoulders and places it back with God where it belongs.
God is smart. That's all I can say. It's very nice to be back on track mentally and spiritually. I've struggled the past 4-5 months. I've needed encouragement from my brothers and sisters and felt a severe lack of that encouragement. I've even been reprimanded by folks because I asked for folks to encourage me. Anyway, it's all good. Some few folks reached out to me in a positive way, not through my pleas, but through the wisdom and working of God. They don't even know that God used them when I really needed a kind word from someone.
Well, there's not much else happening. I've got some ideas and plans for new things I want to accomplish next semester using the internet and some of my abilities. We'll see what comes of it. I have every intention of finishing off this last semester stronger than I started our whole journey here. God willing, I'll be able to reach more people than just in China. Please continue to pray for our family and for our efforts here.